Top 25 Dudes Who Shaped
The AHS Experience
Close but no cigar: Russ
Jewell, Dan "Hutch 2-Fly"
Hutchinson, Jon "Ice" Birg
25 (tie). Greg/Andy
Pietraskiewicz + Keith/Bryan Krasinski -- Twins are pretty classic and must be included
on the list.
Norm Peralta -- A basketball
reject with the heart of a champion.
23. Rich Held/Mike
Rossnagel -- Rich Held was
StuCo President in 1989...until he got busted for selling acid at
BK. Mike Rossnagel took a precious spot on the 1989-90 Freshman
Basketball team...then promptly ran away (who "runs away"?!?),
never to be heard from again. Lesson learned? Don't do drugs.
Studinger -- Gary Coleman +
Pauly Shore = Studinger. Try telling me that Studinger didn't
rock the house.
Wicks -- Eu-stoke-em tubes.
He's now rocking the nation (fortunately for us locals, he's
beginning with the Detroit suburbs) as the mastermind behind the
Prime Ministers (ne Sensitive Clown).
Czanstke -- The face of fear.
Bordine/Greg Bath -- For a
period of time during 91, these two dudes were the definition of
"Chuckie" Sandison --
The dude filed his teeth, for Chrissakes. The only admitted
Satanist I ever came in contact with.
Glover -- This dude came out
of obscurity to achieve Classic Status in Spring Break 92. Will
always be remembered for his 12-step hair combing process and the
bashes he threw at his pad.
Taylor -- Generally regarded
as the Napoleon of AHS. Invented some stellar nicknames for
theorems and students alike ("Mat-Burns", "Doctor
Death", "Cat Ballou" to name but a few).
Uhlar -- Too many stories to
recollect; the best hair in the business.
Patton -- "You know
what your problem is? You were born." Just one of Patton's
many quotable quotes.
13. Michael B.
Boyd -- B Boyd was pretty
classic in high school but really took it to the next level in
college. Plus he's going to marry a Brazilian (!) hottie.
Peters -- Ashley was the
Zach Morris of AHS. `Nuff said.
Popat/Tom Picot -- Proud to
be Americans. Sure their earnesty was often misplaced, but these
dudes were always capable of sweet motivational techniques. Popat
running around the gym during the Homecoming pep rally of 1990
with an American flag to Alabama's "40 Hour Week" (during
the height of the Gulf War) was just too sweet.
Agostinelli -- G(v) was the
algebraic function he was known as. Couldn't fall asleep in
college without at least four shots of Absolut he lifted off
Great Oaks Country Club. Also the genius behind one of the great
all-time comebacks (Dude to Gianni: "Want a piece of gum?"
G to D: "Sure", D to G: "Half or whole?" G to
D: "Just give me a fuckin' piece of gum"). Lighting-quick
hand-eye coordination and reflexes (along with tons of practice)
made him the King of Nintendo/Sega Genesis.
Bonnici -- The #1 Party
Legend in the history of Rochester. Kids in high school today
still talk about his infamous Toga Party. First (and fortunately,
only) person I ever saw light farts on fire. I'll never forget
the entire crowd at RHS chanting "TOGA TOGA" when
Bonnici shot free throws. And I'll also admit that it still
brings me great pain that this guy never made it to the bigs in
the Mariners organization.
8 (tie). Chris
Glinka/Mark Albers -- Two
really good friends whose competitive squabbles are legendary.
Glinka's old skool Buick Grand Prix will go down as one of the
all-time best high school rides, and Malbers' getting ganked by
the DECA judges was one of history's worst jack moves.
Rankins / "Big" Al Walker -- I'll never forget going to JV basketball
practice and seeing Shaan locked up in the back of a police
cruiser. Classic. These guys were the face of The Hood in AHS'
predominantly white high school populus. Both basically good guys,
even though "Big Al" tore down the basketball rim at my
Rosenberg -- The Master of
DECA. Either hated or revered by millions. For better or worse,
this was the man who taught me about business.
Brian Burnett -- B Brian was
the man, although his tragic underuse of his Lakeville cabin is
one of life's greatest travesties.
3. Coach Ken
Belote / Brian Burrell --
Every good story needs a villian. This story has two. I swear
these bastards were in cahoots to wreck the lives of me and my
friends. Both were dickheads beyond belief. Both were responsible
for virtually all my grief from 1990 to 1992. To this day, I
still hate these guys.
2. Jim "Butch"
Bencik -- Everybody loves an
underdog. Jimmy was the A-number-1 underdog scrapper of all-time.
Simply ferocious. Remember his monster jam during the Slam Dunk
Contest? Remember him riding the bike during "Shiny Happy
People" during Mock Rock 92? Remember the three he rained
against Walled Lake Western? Remember the going-away bash for him
at the Motel Six on Opdyke? Of course you do. Just to prove he
wasn't done stirring shit up he went out and beat all the odds
and played Varsity football at the University of Tennessee. Best.
Clark -- Flat out, this kid
revolutionized life as we know it. Straight outta Kingwood TX, AC
busted onto the scene in ninth grade, armed with a wardrobe the
likes of which had never been seen (see the yearbook from our
Freshman year). I'm talkin' white Oxfords, ties, and V-neck
cardigans all over the place. He introduced Suburbia to both
country music AND rap. He got sent back to the locker room during
the first game of Freshman basketball because he was wearing
bicycle shorts. He was the proud owner of THE Jeep w/the Adams
wheel cover. He got busted by Vice Principal Hickey for being
drunk at one of the post-basketball game dances. He got in more
accidents and traffic altercations than anyone else, ever. He
Eddie Haskell-ed all the teachers. He was/is a great friend who
made life fun and exciting every day at AHS. Props out to Clarky.