SNL Season 30 – REVEALED!
Episode 15: Ashton Kutcher/Gwen Stefani (
The
Rating System: Totals:
4 Coneys –
Best Ever 0-10
Coneys – Garbage
0 Coneys –
Worst Ever 11-20
Coneys – Needs Improvement
21-29
Coneys – Average
30-39
Coneys – Above Average
41-49
Coneys -
Instant Classic
50+
Coneys - Unparalleled SNL Genius
1. Cold Opening:
Hardball
Premise: Recurring spoof of the MSNBC talk show
Jason: .5
Coneys Heather:
1 Coney
Jason: 2
Coneys Heather: 2 ½ Coneys
Jason: 1 Coney Heather: 2 Coneys
Premise: Spoof of the daytime show
Jason: 2.5 Coneys
Heather: 2 Coneys
5. Sketch: Push Up Contest
Premise: Kutcher plays a pathetic office worker intent
on beating his co-workers in a push up contest
Jason: 3 Coneys Heather: 1 Coney
6. Commercial Parody: Federline
Premise:
Britney’s husband launches his own underwear line
Jason: 4
Coneys Heather: 3 Coneys
7.
Sketch: Gays in Space
Jason: 1 Coney Heather: ½ Coney
8. Music:
Gwen Stefani (with Eve) “Rich Girl”
Jason: 2
Coneys Heather:
3 Coneys
9.
Weekend Update
Jason: .5
Coneys Heather: 2 Coneys
Premise: A white
preacher adjusts to an African American church
Jason: 0
Coneys Heather:
1 Coney
11.
Sketch: Action 13 News
Premise: The Action News team gets a new
addition to go with their cranky weatherman
Jason: 2
Coneys Heather:
2 Coneys
12. Music:
Gwen Stefani “Hollaback Girl”
Jason: 3
Coneys Heather: 4 Coneys
13. Commercial Parody: Nebulzitol
Premise: Medicine disguised as potato chips designed
to stop men from watching NCAA March Madness
Jason: 0
Coneys Heather:
2 Coneys
Final Coney Order (out
of a possible 52):
Jason: 21 Heather: 26
Episode Comments:
Jason: Tonight’s episode was barely an average outing and
all but cemented the pattern we can expect for the remainder of the season. Gone are the days when you can realistically
hope for a solid show from start to finish. Examine the concepts behind a few of tonight’s
weaker sketches: a white preacher
adjusts to a black church, a weatherman gets fed up with making the wrong
forecast and a woman getting annoyed by how much her husband enjoys NCAA basketball. What is funny about these ideas? Haven’t enough sitcoms and movies trampled
notions like women wishing men didn’t like sports to death already? This is hardly the cutting edge in-your-face
humor the show earned its reputation with.
Despite a
majority of the show coming up short, the episode did manage to find a few
laughs early on. Tonight’s stronger
moments were found in the monologue, Oprah spoof, Push up Contest and the
totally, totally best Federline underwear commercial. Starting with the monologue, Kutcher took the
issue regarding his age difference with Demi Moore and threw it in our
faces. Demi came out dressed in senior
citizen makeup and proceeded to act out what most of us probably think when
Ashton and Demi come to mind. It worked
only because the real Demi was involved.
If they would have attempted to do this with someone like Dratch in the
makeup, I don’t think it would have amounted to much. Interesting tidbit regarding their age difference: the last time Demi was on SNL was when she
hosted in 1988. Do you think the then
10-year-old Ashton was able to stay up for it?
Next came Maya doing another Oprah impression. Since I’m not a Maya fan, I initially
shrugged when this started up. However,
there is something funny about how moronic and sheep-like Oprah’s audience
seems to have become. The idea of a
guest discussing how her life has been destroyed by a fire getting overshadowed
by a surprise cameo by Julia Roberts is hardly far off on the real show. Too bad the joke didn’t have a second part and
the audience overreaction bit started had to be used again and again and
again….
Following
Oprah was the one-two punch of the Push Up Contest and
Federline ad. Push Up
Contest probably won’t have huge replay appeal, but I’ll give it credit for
keeping my attention. Much like
“Reinhold Investments” (Giamatti
Building off
Push Up Contest’s momentum was Federline, yo. This fake underwear spot was easily the
highlight of the show. It was basically
Britney’s husband rolling around in underwear on a bed while talking about himself. Kutcher
captured Federline’s look, voice and attitude perfectly. Federline yo. You may think I stink, but I don’t. So best.
Unfortunately,
Weekend Update was even worse than it was in the Spade episode (which
officially makes it the worst WU since I started doing reviews in 2002). Around midseason I was beginning to think the
Poehler/Fey combo was set to overtake the Fey/Fallon team everyone gushed over
for so long. Now I’m beginning to wish
Fey would have simply handed the reigns to someone completely new over the
summer of 2004 to focus more on being head writer. It is obvious her concentrated efforts are
needed in that department. Forte,
Armisen or even Seth could have handled Update with Poehler (if a duo was still
deemed necessary).
Rounding out
the sketch department was Gays in Space.
Gays has become the latest in a growing list of unnecessary recurring
sketches. It has joined the ranks of
things like Art Dealers (Nuni and Noony), Appalachian Emergency Room, Spy
Glass, Debbie Downer and Starkeesha. Please. No more.
At least Gwen
Stefani delivered some coneys. Gwen,
along with Eve, a high school-like percussion section and Harajuku
girls delivered one of the more memorable performances of a season that will
most likely be remembered more for its strong musical moments like U2, Modest
Mouse, Keane, Kelly Clarkson and of course, the whole Ashlee Simpson ordeal.
With 15
episodes in the can for the season, it is sad only 3 have managed to score an
“above average” rating. SNL can no
longer function with its current staff.
To
state the obvious in yet another review, this show simply has too many cast
members who hit their peak a few seasons back.
Unless a major overhaul of talent
comes over the summer, SNL will officially be entering a dark age not seen
since the early 1980s.
Heather: I have to admit, I was rather shocked to see this week’s episode with
host Ashton Kutcher do as well as it did, maybe even more so than visibleh20
was to discover that I am indeed NOT a man.
That’s not to say that this was an outstanding show, but with a handful
of moderately funny sketches, a hilarious commercial spoof and a knock-out
musical guest, it was decidedly better than most we’ve been subjected to this
season, at least in my own humble opinion.
The evening started out quite shakily with the
cold opener appearance of Hardball. Even
a two month hiatus and Forte’s third stint as Zell Miller, a now pathetic
attempt at humor, couldn’t keep this sketch above water. Surprisingly, Kutcher’s monologue was able to
somewhat salvage the dismal opening by addressing the public’s fascination with
the 15-year age difference between himself and girlfriend Demi Moore. Even though it wasn’t a true monologue, the
idea to include a cameo of
Speaking of
wise decisions, however, who’s idea was it to recycle the totally stupid Gays In Space sketch?
Probably the same person who thought Guest Preacher and Pushup Contest
were comic gold.
Skits like
Oprah, Action 13 News, Nebulzitol and even Weekend Update were actually a
little funnier than what I expected to see in this week’s episode. Despite Ashton’s incessant yelling and
obnoxiously huge open-mouthed smile, I found myself chuckling a bit at each
one. It’s just too bad that merely
average sketches are what I now anticipate seeing each week.
Thankfully, we
were granted some real entertainment in the form of a commercial parody and one
very engaging musical act. Federline was
just plain hilarious. Kevin Federline is
such a tool and Kutcher couldn’t have done a better job at capturing his
toolish persona. “I look like I might
stink, yo. But I don’t. Federline, yo.” Man panties for wiggers. Fucking best.
Equally best
was Ms. Stefani. I was already a fan of
“Rich Girl,” but “Hollaback Girl” really stole the show, complete with
cheerleader garb and drum line. Plus,
she looked absolutely gorgeous. Such a
fun girl!!
While Kutcher
appeared to improve from his last time as SNL host, the show’s overall sketch
quality is still quite lacking in substance, not to mention humor. It seems, lately, that any time the writers
do come up with something truly funny, they immediately rectify it with substandard
material. It’s as if they think we can
only handle the same old jokes that require minimal thinking skills week after
week. Well, not all of us are zombies,
SNL! Some of us still actually like and
believe in the potential strength of this show.
Hopefully Lorne will realize that before it’s too late.
SNL Coney Rankings: Season 30 – REVEALED!
Jude
Law/Ashlee Simpson – 41
Paul
Giamatti/Ludacris (with Sum 41) - 33
Luke
Wilson/U2 – 29
Robert
DeNiro/Destiny’s Child - 28
David
Spade/Jack Johnson - 27
Liam
Neeson/Modest Mouse - 25
Ben
Affleck/Nelly - 23
Queen
Latifah – 22
Kate
Winslet/Eminem – 21
Topher
Grace/The Killers - 21
Ashton
Kutcher/Gwen Stefani - 21
Jason
Bateman/Kelly Clarkson - 20
Colin
Farrell/Scissor Sisters - 18
Hilary
Swank/50 Cent – 16
Heather:
Jude
Law/Ashlee Simpson – 35.5
Paul
Giamatti/Ludacris (with Sum 41) - 29
Robert
DeNiro/Destiny’s Child – 26.5
Ashton
Kutcher/Gwen Stefani - 26
Liam
Neeson/Modest Mouse - 23
Luke
Wilson/U2 – 23
David
Spade/Jack Johnson - 21
Jason
Bateman/Kelly Clarkson - 19
Kate
Winslet/Eminem – 18.5
Colin
Farrell/Scissor Sisters – 18.5
Topher
Grace/The Killers - 17
Ben
Affleck/Nelly – 16.5
Hilary
Swank/50 Cent - 15
Queen
Latifah – 14.5